Table of Contents

“R” Quotations

RACE [as in CONTEST]

(see also ATHLETES & ATHLETICISM and COMPETITION and CONTEST and RUNNING & JOGGING and MARATHON and OLYMPICS and SPORT and SWIMMING and TRACK & FIELD and TROPHY and VICTORY & DEFEAT)

Franklin preceded the thought by writing: “Strive to be the greatest Man in your Country, and you may be disappointed; Strive to be the best, and you may succeed.”

RACE [as in HUMAN BEINGS]

(see also ASIANS and BIGOTRY and BLACKS and [Racial] DISCRIMINATION and PREJUDICE and MINORITIES and RACE RELATIONS and RACISM & RACIAL PREJUDICE) and WHITES)

[Rat] RACE

RACE RELATIONS

(see also BIGOTRY and [Racial] DISCRIMINATION and PREJUDICE and MINORITIES and RACE and RACISM & RACIAL PREJUDICE)

RACISM & RACIAL PREJUDICE

(includes [Racial] DISCRIMINATION; see also BIGOTRY and MINORITIES and PREJUDICE and RACE and RACE RELATIONS and SEGREGATION and SEXISM and SLAVERY and STEREOTYPES)

On the theme of frame-flipping, Coates continued: “So the gay do not simply want to marry; they want to convert our children into sin. The Jews do not merely want to be left in peace; they actually are plotting world take-over. And the blacks are not actually victims of American power, but beneficiaries of the war against hard-working whites. This is a respectable, more sensible bigotry, one that does not seek to name-call, preferring instead change the subject and straw man. Thus segregation wasn’t necessary to keep the niggers in line, it was necessary to protect the honor of white women.”

QUOTE NOTE: The words of the song are delivered by Lt. Joe Cable, who is attempting to explain the origins of racial prejudice to his friend Emile. The song was quite controversial at the time, and both Rodgers and Hammerstein strongly resisted numerous recommendations to drop it completely from the production. When the show went on tour in the American South, Georgia legislators attempted to halt its staging by introducing a bill outlawing any form of entertainment that contained “an underlying philosophy inspired by Moscow” (happily, it failed to pass). Later in life, author James Michener (on whose 1947 novel the musical was based) reflected about Rodgers and Hammerstein’s decision to stick with the song: “The authors replied stubbornly that this number represented why they had wanted to do this play, and that even if it meant the failure of the production, it was going to stay in.”

QUOTE NOTE: Dr. Poussaint was responding to the following remark from Dr. Renee Binder, of the American Psychiatry Association’s Council on Psychiatry and Law: “Racism is not something that is designated as an illness that can be treated by mental health professionals.”

RADIO

(see also CINEMA and COMMUNICATIONS and CULTURE and ENTERTAINMENT and FILM & FILMMAKING and MEDIA and MOVIES and RADIO & TELEVISION and STAGE and TECHNOLOGY and TELEVISION and [Public] TELEVISION and THEATER)

Nahin continued: “Even if we drop the ‘electronic’ qualifier, only the automobile can compete with radio in terms of its effect on changing the very structure of society.”

QUOTE NOTE: Even Sarnoff, though, had to be surprised at how successful this new household utility would become. Nearly twenty years later, Sarnoff also saw the launch of another major invention, television. In his April 20, 1939 announcement that the National Broadcasting Company would begin regular television programming, Sarnoff said: “And now we add radio sight to sound.”

RADIO & TELEVISION

(see also CINEMA and COMMUNICATIONS and CULTURE and ENTERTAINMENT and FILM & FILMMAKING and MEDIA and MOVIES and RADIO and STAGE and TECHNOLOGY and TELEVISION and [Public] TELEVISION and THEATER)

RAGE

(includes OUTRAGE; see also ANGER and ANIMOSITY and ANTIPATHY and EMOTION and ENMITY and FEAR and HOSTILITY and LOVE and LOVE & HATE and RESENTMENT and REVENGE and VENGEANCE)

QUOTE NOTE: Adams viewed himself as an ordinary man elevated by the extraordinary events of his time. He introduced the foregoing thought by writing: “There is a feebleness and a languor in my nature. My mind and body both partake of this weakness. By my physical constitution I am but an ordinary man.”

Arendt introduced the thought by writing: “Rage is by no means an automatic reaction to misery and suffering as such; no one reacts with rage to an incurable disease or to an earthquake or, for that matter, to social conditions that seem to be unchangeable.”

QUOTE NOTE: Several years later, in 1961, Baldwin was one of a number of notable participants in a symposium on “The Negro in American Culture,” broadcast on WBAI-FM in New York City (later published in Cross Currents, Summer, 1961). Early in the proceedings, Baldwin amplified on his observation above: “To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time. So that the first problem is how to control that rage so that it won’t destroy you.”

Cioran introduced the thought by writing: “Vengeance is a need, the most intense and profound of all, and…each man must satisfy it, if only in words. If we stifle that need, we expose ourselves to certain disturbances. More than one disorder—perhaps all disorders—derive from a vengeance too long postponed.”

More than a decade earlier, in a December 1991 issue of Us magazine, Close had offered a similar thought: “I’ve always felt that behind any great creation, there’s a sense of outrage. I don’t think complacent people can do disturbing art.”

ERROR ALERT: This quotation is often mistakenly attributed to Shakespeare, but it does not appear in the original 1602 production, often described as one of Shakespeare’s “problem plays.” Dryden completely rewrote the play, even adding a Prologue spoken by a “ghost of Shakespeare.”

QUOTE NOTE: When Rushdie went into a full decade of hiding after the Ayatollah Khomeini issued a 1989 fatwa ordering his death, he chose Joseph Anton as his “cover” name (in homage to Joseph Conrad and Anton Chekhov). In the memoir, Rushdie made the somewhat unusual decision of writing about Joseph Anton (that is, about himself) in the third rather than the first person.

Stone continued: “Such a position is, psychologically and emotionally speaking, almost unbearable. Rage and despair accumulate with no place to go.”

RAIN

(includes PRECIPITATION and SLEET; see also DROUGHT and FLOODS and HURRICANES and RAINBOW and SNOW and STORM and TYPHOON and WEATHER and WIND)

RANCOR

(see also ACRIMONY and ANGER and ANIMOSITY and HATE and HOSTILITY and MALICE and VINDICTIVENESS)

QUOTE NOTE: I’ve also seen this thought translated as, “Rancor emanates from a sense of inferiority.”

Post continued: “One who can not help sulking, or explaining, or protesting when the loser, or exulting when the winner, has no right to take part in games or contests.”

RAPE

(see also AGGRESSION and SEX and VIOLENCE)

QUOTE NOTE: About her book, now considered a feminist classic, Brownmiller wrote: “My purpose in this book has been to give rape its history. Now we must deny it a future.”

QUOTE NOTE: In A 1979 address at A Women Against Pornography Conference, Gloria Steinem echoed the theme: “Pornography is the instruction; rape is the practice, battered women are the practice, battered children are the practice.”

RATIONALITY & IRRATIONALITY

(see also EMOTIONS and FEELINGS and HEAD & HEART and PASSION and RATIONALIZATION and REASON & REASONING and SUPERSTITION and THOUGHT)

ERROR ALERT: Almost all internet quotation sites present the quotation without the post-postmodernism phrase.

Gell-Mann, the winner of the 1969 Nobel Prize in Physics, continued: “My own experience, whether engaging in introspection or observing others, has always been that rationality is only one of many factors governing human behavior and by no means always the dominant factor.”

In comparing the rational to the intuitive mind, Lamott continued: “Rationality squeezes out much that is rich and juicy and fascinating.”

Harker continued: “A completely rational person would recognize that the culture was crazy and refuse to conform. But by not conforming, he is the one who would be judged crazy by that particular society.”

O’Hair continued: “It won’t get them anywhere; it certainly won’t make them happier or more compassionate human beings; but if they want to chew that particular cud. they’re welcome to it.”

Lord Chesterfield continued: “No, we are complicated machines; and though we have one main spring that gives motion to the whole, we have an infinity of little wheels, which, in their turns, retard, precipitate, and sometimes stop that motion.”

QUOTE NOTE: Yerby described the novel as “a demythologized account of the beginnings of Christianity,” and said he had been researching and writing it for thirty years. He preceded the thought above by writing: “This novel touches upon only two issues which, in a certain sense, might be called controversial: Whether any man truly has the right to believe fanciful and childish nonsense; and whether any organization has the right to impose, by almost imperial fiat, belief in things that are not so,”

RATIONALIZATION

(see also EXCUSES and MIND and IRRATIONALITY and JUSTIFICATION and LIES & LYING and REASON & RATIONALITY and SELF-DECEPTION)

Rand continued: “The price of rationalizing is the hampering, the distortion, and, ultimately, the destruction of one’s cognitive faculty. Rationalization is a process not of perceiving reality, but of attempting to make reality fit one’s emotions.”

ERROR ALERT: Many internet quotation collections, and even a number of Rand tribute sites, have this final phrase worded as a process of not rather than a process not of.

READERS & READING

(see also AUTHORS and BOOKS and LITERACY and READABILITY and RE-READING and STORIES & STORYTELLING and WRITING and WRITERS)

Addison added: “As by the one, health is preserved, strengthened, and invigorated; by the other, virtue (which is the health of the mind) is kept alive, cherished, and confirmed.”

Bacon continued with what has become one of his most famous observations: “Some books are to be tasted, others to be swallowed, and some few to be chewed and digested; that is, some books are to be read only in parts; others to be read, but curiously; and some few to be read wholly, and with diligence and attention.”

Berger continued: “What is to happen next will take place within the four walls of the story. And this is possible because the story’s voice makes everything its own.”

Bradbury added: “A true good read is surely an act of innovative creation in which we, the readers, become conspirators.”

Bulwer-Lytton added: “More is got from one book on which the thought settles for a definite end in knowledge, than from libraries skimmed over by a wandering eye.”

Charles Lamb was likely inspired by this observation when he wrote five years later in The New Times (Jan. 13, 1825): “We read to say we have read,”

Ephron introduced the thought by writing: “Reading is one of the main things I do. Reading is everything. Reading makes me feel I’ve accomplished something, learned something, become a better person. Reading makes me smarter. Reading gives me something to talk about later on.”

Later in the Foreword, Fadiman wrote: “Rereading forces you to spend time, at claustrophobically close range, with your earnest, anxious, pretentious, embarrassing former self, a person you thought you had left behind but who turns out to have been living inside you all along.”

Gibbon added: “The perusal of a particular work gives birth, perhaps, to ideas unconnected with the subject of which it treats.”

Golden continued: “Reading is a partnership. Like any partnership, you get as much out of it as you put into it. Some partnerships are profitable, some just dead horses.”

Heimel began the article by writing: “Reading a book by a good writer is the most pleasurable experience possible, even better than eating a freshly baked brownie dipped with chocolate-chocolate-chip ice cream sprinkled with nuts. With a side of champagne truffles.”

The narrator preceded this thought by saying: “The true division of humanity is this: the luminous and the dark. To diminish the number of the dark, to increase the number of the luminous, behold the aim. That is why we cry: education, knowledge!”

QUOTE NOTE: This passage, translated by Rose in 1994, was rendered in the following way in an 1887 translation by Isabel F. Hapgood): “The real human division is this: the luminous and the shady. To diminish the number of the shady, to augment the number of the luminous—that is the object. That is why we cry: Education! Science! To teach reading, means to light the fire; every syllable spelled out sparkles.”

ERROR ALERT: Many internet sites mistakenly present the observation as if it ended “are worth re-reading.”

These were the concluding words of the essay. On the importance of securing attention, Johnson had earlier written: “The true art of memory is the art of attention.”

Lebowitz continued: “I read two to four mysteries a week. I don’t care who did it. I read them for the soothing prose.”

ERROR ALERT: In almost all blogs and internet sites, this quotation is mistakenly presented as: “We should read to give our souls a chance to luxuriate.”

QUOTE NOTE: Lady Montagu was advising her adult daughter on the raising of her own daughter Louisa, who was then approaching her fifth birthday. On the special benefits that reading might provide to girls, Lady Montagu added: “She will not want new fashions nor regret the loss of expensive diversions or variety of company if she can be amused with an author in her closet.” The advice appeared to work. Louisa became an avid reader, attempted a first novel at age ten, and went on to become well known for her own writing (although as Lady Louisa, she refused to have any of her works published under her own name in her lifetime).

QUOTE NOTE: This lovely tribute to reading has been translated in a number of interesting ways:

“Study has been to me a sovereign remedy against the vexations of life, having never had an annoyance that one hour’s reading did not dissipate.”

“Study has been for me the sovereign remedy against all the disappointments of life. I have never known any trouble that an hour’s reading would not dissipate.”

ERROR ALERT: This has become one of Oate’s most popular observations, but it is almost always mistakenly presented as if it began: Reading is the sole means….

ERROR ALERT: Almost all internet sites mistakenly present the quotation as if it began Reading is that fruitful miracle.

QUOTE NOTE: This passage has also been translated as follows: “In reality every reader is, while he is reading, the reader of his own self. The writer’s work is merely a kind of optical instrument which he offers to the reader to enable him to discern what, without this book, he would perhaps never have perceived in himself.”

Describing the character Audrey, a single working woman in London during WWII, the narrator of the story continued: “The only difficulty, was that after finishing the last sentence, she was left with a feeling at once hollow and uncomfortably full. Exactly like indigestion.”

QUOTE NOTE: Schmich, the recipient of a 2012 Pulitzer Prize for commentary, wasn’t the first to view reading as a ticket or a form of travel, but she certainly crafted the most quoteworthy observation on the subject. For more on the ticket/travel metaphor, see the October, 2015 post by quotation researcher Barry Popik.

In his 1993 memoir In the Web of Ideas: The Education of a Publisher, Charles Scribner, Jr. echoed Schopenhauer’s thought, and expanded on it: “Reading is a means of thinking with another person’s mind; it forces you to stretch your own. When you are reading a book by a great mind you have to stand on tiptoe, so to speak, to grasp the whole of what is being said.”

Shea continued: “Many gifted writers have been keenly aware of this fact—that their final period does not end the creative process. It begins it.”

Smith introduced the thought by writing: “It is no more necessary that a man should remember the different dinners and suppers which have made him healthy than the different books which have made him wise.” Two years later, in Parerga and Paralipomena (1851), Arthur Schopenhauer flirted with plagiarism when he wrote: “To expect a man to retain everything that he has ever read is like expecting him to carry about in his body everything that he has ever eaten.”

Spencer added that reading “is learning indirectly through another man’s faculties instead of directly through one’s own.”

Spender added about reading: “It is the immortal spirit of the dead realized within the bodies of the living. It is sacramental.”

ERROR ALERT: In her otherwise wonderful How Reading Changed My Life (1998) Anna Quindlen mistakenly attributed this observation to Michel de Montaigne.

QUOTE NOTE: For Thoreau, the book in question was Emerson’s Nature, published in 1836. And for me—as well as countless others over the years—the book that dated a new era was Walden. Thoreau introduced the thought by writing: “There are probably words addressed to our condition exactly, which, if we could really hear and understand, would be more salutary than the morning or spring to our lives, and possibly put a new aspect on the face of things for us.”

ERROR ALERT: Most Internet sites mistakenly present a paraphrased version of this observation: “No two persons ever read the same book.”

Zaid, continued: “It leads him to participate in conversations, and in some cases to arrange them, as so many active readers do.”

READABILITY

(see also AUTHORS and BOOKS and READERS & READING and RE-READING and STORIES & STORYTELLING and WRITING and WRITERS)

REALISM

(see also CYNICISM & CYNICS and DISPOSITION and FANTASY and IDEALISM & IDEALISTS and IDEALS and OPTIMISM and OPTIMISM & PESSIMISM and PERSPECTIVE and PESSIMISM and REALISM & FANTASY and ROMANTICISM and SURREALISM)

REALISM & FANTASY

(see also FANTASY and REALISM)

REALISTIC

REALITY

(see also APPEARANCE and FACTS and ILLUSION and PERCEPTION and REALISM and SYMBOLS and TRUTH)

QUOTE NOTE: This saying has been appearing on t-shirts and car bumper stickers since the 1980s.

Bohr preceded the observation by saying: “I myself find the division of the world into an objective and a subjective side much too arbitrary.”

Cary introduced the thought by writing: “We have to have conceptual knowledge to organize our societies, to save our own lives, to lay down general ends for conduct, to engage in any activity at all, but that knowledge, like the walls we put up to keep out the weather, shuts out the real world and the sky.”

ERROR ALERT: ALmost all internet sites mistakenly present Cary’s observation as if it began Reality is a narrow…. It is not reality that is a narrow little house, according to Cary, but the symbols and concepts created by human beings to represent reality.

QUOTE NOTE: This has become one of Dick’s most popular quotations. In the book, it is part of this larger observation: “Once, when I lectured at the University of California at Fullerton, a student asked me for a short, simple definition of reality. I thought it over and answered, ‘Reality is that which when you stop believing in it, it doesn’t go away’.” In The Yale Book of Quotations (2006), Fred Shapiro writes that Dick first offered the line in a 1978 lecture, “How To Build A Universe That Doesn’t Fall Apart in Two Days.”

Ehrenreich continued: “Thunder is not a tantrum in the sky, disease is not a divine punishment, and not every death or accident results from witchcraft.”

In her book, Ehrenreich also offered an observation that seemed relevant at the beginning in the early stages of the Covid pandemic: “When the stakes are high enough and the risks obvious, we still turn to people who can be counted on to understand those risks and prepare for worst-case scenarios. A chief of state does not want to hear a general in the field say that he 'hopes' to win tomorrow's battle or that he's he’s ‘visualizing victory.’”

Halsey continued: “As a matter of fact, with a firm enough commitment, you can sometimes create a reality which did not exist before. Protestantism itself is proof of that.”

Dr. King continued: “He who hates does not know God; he who hates has no knowledge of God. Love is the supreme unifying principle of life.”

In her book, Thomas went on to write: “So it is useless to evade reality, because it only makes it more virulent in the end. But instead, look steadfastly into the slit, pin-pointed, malignant eyes of reality: as an old-hand trainer dominates his wild beasts. Take it by the scruff of the neck, and shake the evil intent out of it; till it rattles out harmlessly, like gall bladder stones, fossilized on the floor.”

In the words for Tomlin’s legendary one-woman show, Wagner also wrote: “I made some studies, and reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it. I can take it in small doses, but as a lifestyle I found it too confining.”

REASON & REASONING

(see also AUTHORITY and EMOTION and FAITH and IGNORANCE and LOGIC and PASSION and PHILOSOPHY and RATIONALISM and THOUGHT)

QUOTE NOTE: The Reverend Arthur Villars, Evelina’s guardian and a sort of father-figure to her, was concerned about his young charge’s fascination with a young gentleman. In expressing his concern about the “the ascendancy which Lord Orville has gained upon your mind,” he began the observation above by writing that she was “Young, animated, entirely off your guard, and thoughtless of consequences.” A bit earlier in the letter, he offered one of history’s best descriptions of innocence:

“Alas, my child!—that innocence, the first, best gift of Heaven—the most exposed to treachery—and the least able to defend itself, in a world where it is little known, less valued, and perpetually deceived!”

Dawkins continued: “We must favor verifiable evidence over private feeling. Otherwise we leave ourselves vulnerable to those who would obscure the truth.”

QUOTE NOTE: The letter to Carr also included this other famous Jefferson observation: “Question with boldness even the existence of a god; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blindfolded fear.”

QUOTE NOTE: I’ve also seen the quotation translated this way: “To reason with poorly chosen words is like using a pair of scales with inaccurate weights.” Maurois began by writing that there are no disputes in algebra because all terms are precisely defined. In most human discourse, by contrast, language is imprecise. He wrote: “The words used in speaking about emotions, about the conduct of government, are vague words which may be employed in the same argument with several different meanings.”

ERROR ALERT: All over the internet, this observation is mistakenly presented as: “To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead.”

Two years earlier, in Rights of Man, II (1792), Paine had written: “Reason, like time, will make its own way, and prejudice will fall in a combat with interest.”

REASONS (as in RATIONALE)

(see also MOTIVATION and REASON & REASONING)

REBELS & REBELLION

(see also [Civil] DISOBEDIENCE and DISSENT and PROTEST and RESISTANCE and REVOLUTION)

QUOTE NOTE: In discussing a slave’s first act of rebellion, Camus went on to write that “his no affirms the existence of a borderline” and that his stance “says yes and no simultaneously.”

QUOTATION CAUTION: Many internet sites and quotation anthologies present a truncated version of the thought: “What is a rebel? A man who says no.”

QUOTE NOTE: In the first part of the observation, Ehrenreich references a famous observation from Samuel Johnson, to be see in Patriots & Patriotism.

RECEIVING

(see also GIVING and GIVING & RECEIVING)

RECIPES & COOKBOOKS

(see also COOKS & COOKING and DESCRIPTIONS—OF FOODS & PREPARED DISHES and DESSERT and DINNER & DINING and EGGS & OMELETTES and FOOD & DRINK and GASTRONOMY and SAUCES and SPICES & SEASONING and SOUPS & SALADS and SUPPER and VEGETARIANISM & VEGANISM)

QUOTE NOTE: This is how the quotation is almost always presented in quotation anthologies. While technically accurate, it’s a slight abridgement of Codrescu’s original fuller remark: “In the bookstore, the place formerly reserved for books to be read has also been taken over by cookbooks, which bear the same relation to real books that microwave food bears to your grandmother’s.”

RECOVERY

(See also ADDICTION and ALCOHOLISM and CODEPENDENCY and COUNSELING & PSYCHOTHERAPY and DENIAL and DRUG ABUSE and HEALING and ILLNESS and PROBLEM-SOLVING and REHABILITATION)

In the book, Kaminer also wrote: “There are only two states of being in the world of codependency—recovery and denial.”

RECREATION

(See also AMUSEMENT and DIVERSION and ENJOYMENT and FUN and HOBBY and PLAY and PLEASURE and RELAXATION)

REFLECTION

(includes CONTEMPLATION and INTROSPECTION and MEDITATION and SELF-EXAMINATION)

REFORM

(includes REFORMATION and REFORMERS; see also CHANGE and IDEALISM & IDEALISTS and IMPROVE & IMPROVEMENT)

REFUGE

(see also ESCAPE and REFUGE METAPHORS and REFUGEES and SAFETY

REFUGE METAPHORS

(see also metaphors involving ANIMALS, BASEBALL, BATHING & BATHS, BIRTH, BOXING & PRIZEFIGHTING, CANCER, DANCING, DARKNESS, DEATH, DISEASE, FOOTBALL, FRUIT, GARDENING, HEART, JOURNEYS, LIGHT & LIGHTNESS, MOTHERS, PARTS OF SPEECH, PATHS, PLANTS, PUNCTUATION, RETAIL/WHOLESALE, RIVERS & STREAMS, ROAD, NAUTICAL, SUN & MOONS, VEGETABLES, and WEIGHTS & MEASURES)

QUOTE NOTE: This is one of quotation history’s most celebrated observations, and the inspiration for numerous spin-offs (many to be found in this section). In The Devil’s Dictionary (1911), Ambrose Bierce wrote: “In Dr. Johnson’s famous dictionary patriotism is defined as the last resort of a scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer I beg to submit that it is the first.”

REFUGEES

(see also ALIENS and EXPATRIATES and IMMIGRANTS)

Morgan continued: “The ‘feminization of poverty’ means that children are poor, too, since most parenting is done by mothers.”

REFUSAL

(see also DENIAL and REQUEST and [Saying] NO) and [Setting} LIMITS

REGRET

(see also APOLOGY and ATONEMENT and FORGIVENESS and RECONCILIATION and REMORSE and REPENTANCE)

Breathnach went on to add: “Each day is another chance to be swept away.”

Later in the broadcast, Copaken added: “You can choose to decide in your life whether regret is just going to stick on you like a cold, wet blanket, or whether you can use that regret as fuel. If you use regret to make changes, positive changes in your life, then regret is the best fuel in the world.”

QUOTE NOTE: In the play, Felt, a successful New York businessman, is reflecting on his life and the choices he has made. Here, in moment of introspection, he offers the intriguing idea that regret does not have to be a negative thing, and can actually be an indication of a life well lived.

QUOTE NOTE: Thoreau, who was twenty-two years old when he wrote this, preceded the thought by writing: “Make the most of your regrets; never smother your sorrow, but tend and cherish it till it come [sic] to have a separate and integral interest.”

QUOTE NOTE: After ticking off some typical statements of regret (like “He never knew what he was to me” and “I always meant to make more of our friendship”), the narrator continued: “How much more we might make of our family life, of our friendships, if every secret thought of love blossomed into a deed!” And then a moment after that, the narrator continued: “There are words and looks and little observances, thoughtfulnesses, watchful little attentions, which speak of love, which make it manifest, and there is scarce a family that might not be richer in heart-wealth for more of them.”

REINVENTION

(see also CHANGE and CREATION and GROWTH and INVENTION and RENEWAL and RISK & RISK-TAKING)

REJECTION

(see also DISMISS and [Unrequited] LOVE and RENUNCIATION and SCORN and SPURN)

Nowinski continued: “In men as well as women, insecurity comes from a combination of a sensitive disposition and experiences of loss, abuse, rejection, or neglect.”

RELATIONSHIPS

(see also COMMUNICATION and CONVERSATION and COUPLES and EMPATHY and FRIENDSHIP and LISTENING and MALE-FEMALE DYNAMICS and UNDERSTANDING OTHERS)

QUOTE NOTE: Byron wrote his letter from Ravenna, Italy, where he lived from 1819-21 with his lover, the Contessa Guiccioli (she was nineteen when Byron met her, and married at the time to an Italian nobleman forty years her senior). While the couple had a deep and passionate relationship, Byron did not necessarily view it as a lasting one. His note to Hoppner continued: “I may stay a day, a week, a year, all my life; but all this depends on what I can neither see nor foresee. I came because I was called, and will go the moment that I perceive what may render my departure proper.”

Just prior to this thought, the narrator had written about Scobie: “The truth, he thought, has never been of any real value to any human being—it is a symbol for mathematicians and philosophers to pursue.”

Harrison began by writing: “Kindness and intelligence don’t always deliver us from the pitfalls and traps: there are always failures of love, of will, of imagination.”

Lindbergh continued: “To touch heavily would be to arrest the pattern and freeze the movement, to check the endlessly changing beauty of its unfolding. There is no place here for the possessive clutch, the clinging arm, the heavy hand; only the barest touch in passing. Now arm in arm, now face to face, now back to back—it does not matter which. Because they know they are partners moving to the same rhythm, creating a pattern together, and being invisibly nourished by it.”

Noonan went on to explain: “With people who give a lot of themselves, you sometimes lean back—but with people who give little you often lean forward, as if they’re a spigot in the desert and you’re the empty cup. It is the tropism of deprivation: We lean toward those who do not give.”

Roark continued: “An architect needs clients, but he does not subordinate his work to their wishes. They need him, but they do not order a house just to give him commission. Men exchange their work by free, mutual consent to mutual advantage when their personal interests agree and they both desire the exchange.”

Rogers continued: “If they are expressed as feelings, owned by me, the result may be temporarily upsetting but ultimately far more rewarding than any attempt to deny or conceal them.”

ERROR ALERT: This quotation is popularly abridged in the following way: “Man is a knot into which relationships are tied.”

Walpole continued: “This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing, it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of Divine accident.”

QUOTE NOTE: Many thanks to Garson O’Toole, aka The Quote Investigator, for his help in researching this quotation (see his entry here).

RELATIVISM

(see also ETHICS and [Situational] ETHICS and GOOD & EVIL and GOODNESS and MORALS & MORALITY and RELIGION and SIN and VICE)

Goodman went on to add, “Moral problems become medical ones and yesterday’s sinners become today’s patients.”

Willis Continued: “But in recent years, conservatives bent on reinstating an essentially religious vocabulary of absolute good and evil as the only legitimate framework for discussing social values have redefined ‘relative’ as ‘arbitrary.’”

RELATIVITY

(Quotes to Come)

RELAXATION

(includes REST & RELAXATION (R&R); see also LABOR and RECREATION and VACATION and WORK and WORKAHOLICS)

Podesta continued “And that’s just what we do when we spend time doing something we enjoy. Recreation helps us charge our batteries, re-create our energy, and continue to give our best at work.”

RELIGION

(includes [Organized] RELIGION; see also BELIEF and BUDDHISM and CATHEDRALS & CHURCHES and CHRISTIANITY and CHURCH and CHURCH & STATE and CLERGY and ETHICS and FAITH and FUNDAMENTALISM and GOD and HEAVEN and HELL and HERESY & HERETICS and ISLAM and MARTYRS & MARTYRDOM and MISSIONARIES and MORALITY and MYSTICISM and PHILOSOPHY and PHILOSOPHY & RELIGION and POLITICS & RELIGION and PRAYER and SAINTS & SAINTHOOD and SCIENCE & RELIGION and SIN and SPIRITUALITY and THEOLOGY and WORSHIP)

Ackerman continued “That sense of being stirred by powerful unseen forces, accompanied by a great spiritual awakening, in which life is viewed by fresh eyes, has been replaced, in many cases, by the emotionless, repetitious, and mundane.”

Armstrong continued: “If your understanding of the divine made you kinder, more empathetic, and impelled you to express this sympathy in concrete acts of loving-kindness, this was good theology. But if your notion of God made you unkind, belligerent, cruel, or self-righteous, or if it led you to kill in God’s name, it was bad theology.”

Armstrong preceded the observation by saying: “A lot of the arguments about religion going on at the moment spring from a rather inept understanding of religious truth. Our notion changed during the early modern period when we became convinced that the only path to any kind of truth was reason. That works beautifully for science but doesn’t work so well for the humanities.”

Doc continued: “And what do I mean by technology? The study and application of the laws that govern events in our lives. Just that.”

QUOTE NOTE: Three years earlier, in Major Barbara (1907), George Bernard Shaw had his character Undershaft say: “I am a Millionaire. That is my Religion.”

Bell added: “Between aesthetic and religious rapture there is a family alliance. Art and Religion are means to similar states of mind.”

Speaking on behalf of religious tolerance, Burke continued: “On the lava and ashes…of old eruptions grow the peaceful olive, the cheering vine, and the sustaining corn.”

Campbell continued: “But when it gets stuck in its own metaphors, interpreting them as facts, then you are in trouble.”

A half century later, the patriotism as religion metaphor was further pursued (but taken in an entirely new direction) by Guy de Maupassant, who wrote in the short story “My Uncle Sosthenes” (1883): “Patriotism is a kind of religion; it is the egg from which wars are hatched.”

In his book, Downey also wrote: “Religion is the clearest telescope through which we can behold the beauties of creation, and the good of our Creator.”

QUOTE NOTE: A grand declaration is designed to get the attention of thoughtful readers, and this one succeeds admirably. In the book, Durant continued: “In our youth, we may have resented, with proud superiority, its cherished incredibilities; in our less confident years we marvel at its prosperous survival in a secular and scientific age, its patient resurrection after whatever deadly blows by Epicurus, or Lucretius, or Lucan, or Machiavelli, or Hume, or Voltaire. What are the secrets of this resilience?”

A moment earlier, Dyson introduced the thought by writing: “We all know that religion has been historically, and still is today, a cause of great evil as well as great good in human affairs.”

Einstein preceded the thought by writing: “When considering the actual living conditions of present day civilized humanity from the standpoint of even the most elementary religious commands, one is bound to experience a feeling of deep and painful disappointment at what one sees.”

QUOTE NOTE: This is how the observation is typically presented and, while it is accurate, it was originally the conclusion to a slightly larger observation: “A man may die by fever as well as by consumption, and religion is as effectually destroyed by bigotry as by indifference.”

Franklin continued: “And the Scripture assures me, that at the last Day, we shall not be examin’d [for] what we thought, but what we did; and our Recommendation will not be that we said Lord, Lord, but that we did GOOD to our Fellow Creatures.”

Frye preceded the thought by writing: “The disinterested imaginative core of mythology is what develops into literature, science, philosophy.”

Gurdjieff, a prominent 20th century spiritual teacher and mystic, added: “A man does not merely think his religion or feel it, he “lives” his religion as much as he is able, otherwise it is not religion but fantasy or philosophy.”

In that same work, the spiritual leader also said: “Whether one believes in a religion or not, and whether one believes in rebirth or not, there isn't anyone who doesn't appreciate kindness and compassion.”

In another aphorism from the same work, Jourbert wrote: “One man finds in religion his literature and his science, another finds in it his joy and his duty.”

Kaminer continued: “Faith is not a function of stupidity, but a frequent cause of it.”

Lawrence continued: “So I contend that true Socialism is religion; that honest, fervent politics are religion; that whatever a man will labor for earnestly and in some measure unselfishly is religion.”

Maddalon preceded the thought by writing: “Religion, power and control; three words, too often meaning the same thing.”

A bit later in the interview, the 1988 Nobel Prize laureate went on to say: “I consider religion an essential human behavior. Still, it’s clearly more important to treat one’s fellow man well than to be always praying and fasting and touching one’s head to a prayer mat. God did not intend religion to be an exercise club.”

ERROR ALERT: These famous words are commonly misquoted as: “Religion is the opium of the people.” It is also commonly presented: “Religion is the opium of the masses.”

Myers continued: “It’s not something I want to ban or that should affect hiring and firing decisions, or that interferes with public policy. It will be perfectly harmless as long as we don’t elect our politicians on the basis of their bowling score, or go to war with people who play nine-pin instead of ten-pin, or use folklore about backspin to make decrees about how biology works.”

Niebuhr preceded the thought by saying: “One of the fundamental points about religious humility is you say you don’t know about the ultimate judgment. It’s beyond your judgment.”

QUOTE NOTE: This popular observation came as Nizer was hailing the moral character of his former law partner Louis Phillips. Nizer continued: “I have never known anyone whose life was guided by purer concepts of honesty, decency, and justice. These were not to him esoteric concepts to be uttered in a house of worship, or paid obeisance in conversation. They were his daily applied standards of conduct, and he never, never deviated from them no matter what the exigency.”

QUOTE NOTE: Over the years, Paine’s observation has been cited or tweaked countless times by agnostics, atheists, and those who reject organized religion. For example, in a 2013 PBS interview with Charlie Rose (Sep. 17, 2013), the popular entertainer Ricky Gervais said simply: “My religion is kindness.”

QUOTE NOTE: Developing an understanding of the world and our place in it is so fundamentally important to the human experience that Peck concluded: “This understanding is our religion.” He explained that most people define religion too narrowly, linking it to a particular belief of practice. In his view, though, ‘everyone has a religion,’ and it is reflected in their own unique understanding of the world.

ERROR ALERT: The words are from the narrator, playing off the legendary Karl Marx observation. Many quotation collections, including the normally reliable Wikiquote, present the following abridged version: “Religion is not merely the opium of the masses, it’s the cyanide.”

QUOTE NOTE: This is the way the passage has been traditionally translated, with chef d’oeuvre being the French term for “masterpiece,” especially in the artistic or literary realm. In The Viking Book of Aphorisms (1962), W. H. Auden and Louis Kronenberger presented an updated rendition: “Religion is the masterpiece of the art of animal training, for it trains people as to how they shall think.”

In the interview, Sinatra also said: “There are things about organized religion which I resent. Christ is revered as the Prince of Peace, but more blood has been shed in His name than any other figure in history. You show me one step forward in the name of religion and I'll show you a hundred retrogressions. Remember, they were men of God who destroyed the educational treasures at Alexandria, who perpetrated the Inquisition in Spain, who burned the witches at Salem. Over 25,000 organized religions flourish on this planet, but the followers of each think all the others are miserably misguided and probably evil as well.”

QUOTE NOTE: Wells is, of course, playing off the familiar Shakespeare line (“We are such stuff as dreams are made on”) from the character Prospero in The Tempest (1611)

QUOTE NOTE: West earlier used the same observation in her 1960 novel, South of the Angels.

RELIGION & POLITICS

(see POLITICS & RELIGION)

REMARRIAGE

(see also DIVORCE and HUSBANDS & WIVES and MARRIAGE)

QUOTE NOTE: Robert Metz, in his book on The Tonight Show (1980) says that Diller originally made the remark on the show after learning that Liz Taylor and Robert Burton, who had been divorced for a number of years, announced they were remarrying. Diller went on to offer the line in a variety of slightly differing ways over the years, once even in the presence of Ms. Taylor. At a 1981 Damon Runyon-Walter Winchell Cancer Fund event in which Taylor was given the Humanitarian of the Year award, Diller and a number of other celebrities were on hand to warm up the crowd. A piece in People magazine reported that “Taylor’s mouth tightened” when Diller quipped: “I never understood why Elizabeth married Richard Burton the second time. That’s like having your appendix put back in.”

REMEDIES

(see also ANTIDOTE and CORRECTIVE and CURE and MEDICATION and TREATMENT)

REMEMBERING & REMEMBRANCE

(see also FORGETTING & FORGETFULNESS and MEMORY and NOSTALGIA and PAST and REMINISCENCE)

The narrator preceded the thought by writing: “Who expects small things to survive when even the largest get lost?”

Sir George preceded the observation by saying, “Armistice Day isn’t to do with peace. It’s to do with war and remembering one’s dead.”

REMORSE

(see also APOLOGY and ATONEMENT and ERROR and FORGIVENESS and RECONCILIATION and REGRET)

QUOTE NOTE: This is how the quotation is typically presented, but it was originally part of a longer passage in which the narrator was describing the character Jean Nicot, an atheist who is portrayed in unflattering terms in the novel. About Nicot, he says: “Remorse is the echo of a lost virtue, and virtue he never knew. Had he to live again, he would live the same.”

QUOTE NOTE: It’s common for an opening sentence to express the novel’s central theme, but it is rare for those opening words to be so eloquently expressed that they will likely find their way into a future edition of Bartlett’s Familiar Quotations. When I came upon this haunting opening sentence for the first time, I immediately stopped set the book down and added the observation to my personal “Words to Live By” file. I now also regard it as the single best thing ever said on the subject of remorse.

RENAISSANCE

(see also CULTURE and CIVILIZATION)

REPARTEE

(see also INSULTS and RETORTS and WIT)

REPENTANCE

(see also APOLOGY and ATONEMENT and FORGIVENESS and RECONCILIATION and REMORSE and REMORSE)

REPETITION

REPORTERS & REPORTING

(see also COLUMNISTS & COLUMN-WRITING and JOURNALISM & JOURNALISTS and NEWS & NEWSPAPERS and PRESS)

In a 1972 Newsweek article, historian Theodore H. White was quoted as making a similar point, but his focus was entirely on the journalist: “When a reporter sits down at the typewriter, he’s nobody's friend.”

Quindlen continued: “I made people like me, trust me, open their hearts and their minds to me, and cry and bleed on to the pages of my neat little notebooks, and then I went back to a safe place and made a story out of it.”

Quindlen went on to write: “It is a strange business, making a living off other people’s misfortunes, standing in the rubble with a press card as a nominal shield, writing in a crabbed hand notes no one else can read, riding an adrenaline surge that ends in a product at once flimsy and influential.”

REPRESSION [as in TYRANNY]

(see also DICTATORS & DICTATORSHIP and FREEDOM and [Freedom of] SPEECH and LIBERTY and OPPRESSION and REBELLION and RESISTANCE and REVOLUTION & REVOLUTIONARIES and TYRANTS & TYRANNY)

REPRESSION [as in DENIAL]

(see also DENIAL and TRUTH)

REPUTATION

(see also CHARACTER and POPULARITY and PRESTIGE and RESPECTABILITY and STATUS)

Ashe continued: “Now and then, I have wondered whether my reputation matters too much to me; but I can no more easily renounce my concern with what other people think of me than I can will myself to stop breathing. No matter what I do, or where or when I do it, I feel the eyes of others on me, judging me.”

Lothario, who is advising Anselmo how to treat his beloved Camilla, continued: “The virtuous woman must be treated like a relic—adored, but not handled; she should be guarded and prized, like a fine flower-garden, the beauty and fragrance of which the owner allows others to enjoy only at a distance, and through iron walls.”

Dr. Johnson added: “Very few names may be considered as perpetual lamps that shine unconsumed.”

RE-READING

(see also AUTHORS and BOOKS and READERS & READING and STORIES & STORYTELLING and WRITING and WRITERS)

SPELLING NOTE: Re-reading and rereading are both considered acceptable, and you will see both versions reflected in the quotations below. I prefer the former because it is less likely to be met with a double-take reaction on the part of readers

Fadiman continued: “This may sound like a demotion, but after all, it is old friends, not lovers, to whom you are most likely to turn when you need comfort.”

Later in the Foreword, Fadiman wrote: “Rereading forces you to spend time, at claustrophobically close range, with your earnest, anxious, pretentious, embarrassing former self, a person you thought you had left behind but who turns out to have been living inside you all along.”

QUOTE NOTE: This was Number Seven in Vizinczey’s list, and a reminder that aspiring writers should follow the pattern of aspiring musicians by carefully studying—and even emulating—the works of the great masters. He went on to write: “if you understand the masters’ techniques, you have a better chance to develop your own. To put it in terms of chess: there hasn’t yet been a grandmaster who didn’t know his predecessor’s championship games by heart.”

RESCUING & RESCUERS

(see FIRST RESPONDERS and VICTIMS)

Beattie continued: “Help will come, but help is not rescuing. We are our own rescuers. Our relationships will improve dramatically when we stop rescuing others and stop expecting them to rescue us.”

RESENTMENT

(see also ANIMOSITY and ENVY and JEALOUSY)

ERROR ALERT: This observation is often mistakenly attributed to Ann Landers.

QUOTE NOTE: According to quotation researcher Barry Popik, this is the first appearance of the saying in print. Shaef described it as “an old saying,” but my best guess is that it emerged from the recovery movement in the 1980s or early 1990s. Here is Shaef’s complete thought: “If the old saying that ‘expectations are premeditated resentments’ is true, then our expectations are always putting us in an untenable position.” In her 2010 novel Imperfect Birds, Anne Lamott also passed along a popular version of the sentiment, writing about a character: “Elizabeth lived by the adage that expectations were disappointments under construction.”

QUOTE NOTE: This saying, in pretty much this phrasing, went on to achieve great popularity after it was tweaked by others (see the entries below from Susan Cheever, Carrie Fisher, Malachy McCourt, and Neil Kinnock). Thanks to Barry Popik of The Big Apple website for his research. The underlying sentiment that negative emotions toward others are like a poison that can harm the person harboring them goes back more than a century. See the Bert Ghezzi entry below for the earliest appearance of the specific resentment variation.

QUOTE NOTE: Capp was nine-years-old when he was run over by a trolly car. In a coma for several days after the accident, he only realized after regaining consciousness that his leg had been amputated above the knee. In 1991 memoir (My Well-balanced Life on a Wooden Leg), published a dozen years after his death, he expressed the thought in a slightly different way: “I had learned how to live without resentment or embarrassment in a world in which I was different from everyone else. The secret, I found, was to be indifferent to the difference.”

Deepak Chopra, in a Tweet (Aug. 6, 2014)

QUOTE NOTE: Dalrymple’s impressive article on the subject also contained these other memorable observations:

“Considering the importance of resentment in our lives, and the damage it does, it receives scant attention from psychiatrists and psychologists. Resentment is a great rationalizer: it presents us with selected versions of our own past, so that we do not recognize our own mistakes and avoid the necessity to make painful choices.”

“Among my patients, it is clear that this emotion fulfills an important function: to disguise from themselves the extent to which their own decisions and conduct have been responsible for their unhappiness. People prefer the role of immaculate victim of circumstance to that of principal author of their own misery.”

QUOTE NOTE: This appears to be the earliest version of a sentiment that has become almost proverbial under the phrasing Resentment is like taking a poison and waiting for the other person to die (see variations on the theme in entries in this section by Alan Brandt, Susan Cheever, Carrie Fisher, and Malachy McCourt. Thanks to Garson O’Toole, the Quote Investigator, for his impressive research on this quotation (O'Toole’s informative 2017 post identifies even earlier sayings that compare hatred and other negative emotions to a poison).

QUOTE NOTE: While many Reader’s Digest quotations are of questionable authenticity, this one should be considered legitimate. In a personal communication to this compiler in February, 2016, Lord Kinnock recalled making the remark in an interview on ITV, an independent British television network, in 1993.

Marshall continued: “If you do not forgive other people, you yourself can never feel forgiven, because you will never be forgiven.”

More preceded the remark by writing: “The torment of constantly hating any one must be, at least, equal to the sin of it.”