Dr. Mardy's Aphorisms

An aphorism is a brief and pithy observation that attempts to communicate some kind of truth about the human experience—often with a dash of wit or wordplay. The American Heritage Dictionary defines the term this way:

A more vivid description comes from James Geary, a self-described aphorism addict, who wrote the following in his 2005 book The World in a Phrase: A Brief History of the Aphorism:

A popular synonym for an aphorism is maxim, but they are also commonly known as epigrams and adages. Many have gained such widespread currency they are referred to as proverbs, axioms, or truisms. Some have a "guide your life" quality, and are given the honorific title of precept or dictum. Whatever they're called, I have always been a great fan of this family of quotations that try to say a great deal in a few well-chosen and carefully-crafted words.

Over the years, I've even tried my hand at this ancient art. Almost all of my creations have appeared in my weekly e-newsletter Dr. Mardy's Quotes of the Week, which I inaugurated on January 1, 2000 and which continues to exist today. Most of my creations are examples of chiasmus (ky-AZ-mus), my all-time favorite literary device. In all examples of chiasmus, the order of words is reversed in parallel sayings (as in the modern proverb, "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care"). Others are examples of paradoxical and oxymoronic phrasing (as in the proverbial saying, "The more things change, the more they stay the same"). And still others are based on a variety of additional literary devices, like analogies, metaphors, and similes.

Whatever form my creations have taken, I have authored close to a thousand such observations and personal reflections in the past few years—many of which have been praised and admired by the subscribers to my newsletter. And while I have also occasionally penned some clinkers, clunkers and groaners, I have decided to post my collection for the first time here. All of the quotations are, to the best of my knowledge, my original creations. I hope you enjoy them.

If you ever decide to use any of my creations in your writings or other efforts, please cite me, mention that the quote comes from Dr. Mardy's Quotes of the Week, and indicate the year of publication.

Dr. Mardy's 2007 Aphorisms

You were born an original, so don't die a copy.

The high cost of living is a minor problem
when compared to the cost of high living.

Most of us recognize how important it is
to listen respectfully when our loved ones are talking;
but we often forget that it is equally important
to talk respectfully when they are listening.

The voice of reason is inaudible to irrational people.

In all your relationships,
you're never too small to make a big contribution,
and never too big to make a small one.

Most people view philosophy as thought, and not action.
But rightly regarded, philosophy is action guided by thought.

People sometimes forget when you remember,
but they always remember when you forget.

You don't need the best of everything to be happy,
but you do need to be happy to enjoy the best of everything.

We're closest to finding ourselves just when we feel the most lost.

Music doesn't have to be your livelihood to make your 'hood lively."

If you strive too hard for happiness you will never achieve your goal.

People will fervently believe a lot of pretty outlandish things
in order to avoid the pain of actually thinking for themselves.

It is often said that
understanding does not indicate agreement.
It is less well accepted, but also true, that
agreement does not always indicate understanding.

People who parade their holiness are
operating dangerously close to the sin of pride.

Never focus so much on self-development
that you neglect the world;
and never focus so much on the world
that you neglect the development of your self.

Excessive wealth is a great problem
masquerading as a great good.

We tend to see our character flaws as simple defects,
and the simple defects of others as character flaws.

Tying the knot, as it turns out, is a perfect metaphor for marriage.
Like knots, relationships can be well-tied or poorly-tied.
But no matter how well-tied, they tend to loosen over time.
When tied skillfully and periodically monitored,
they are able to hold things together, even through turbulent times.
And when tied unskillfully or ignored over time,
they are unable to contain even the most precious cargo.

Even though it runs counter to popular belief,
Life's critical decisions are usually made in the heart
and only later ratified by the brain.

Sometimes I wonder which is worse—
confrontational people who are afraid of caring
or caring people who are afraid of confrontation.

No matter how hard people have tried,
it's impossible to build a life out of things.

People who are driven to make a lot of money
generally labor under the illusion
that money will make a lot out of them.

A new chiastic toast:
Here's to love from the people you respect
and respect from the people you love.

Men are like microwave ovens; they heat up immediately,
but things start to boil over after about three minutes.
Women are like conventional ovens; they take twenty minutes
to heat up, but can go on cooking for hours.

Women often want men to change,
and are disappointed when they stay the same.
Men often want women to stay the same,
and are disappointed when they change.

People generally feel the greatest craving
for the things they need the least,
or the things they don't need at all.

We can never truly understand the people we hate;
we can never truly hate the people we understand.

Many people have lost their way
while searching for the truth;
and just as many others have found the truth
shortly after thinking they had lost their way.

A number of people had questions about—and even questioned the validity of—this observation. When I explained what I meant, they liked my reply so much they urged me to share it other subscribers. So here it is:

Thanks for your note and your query about my recent observation. I too have been on a lifelong quest for the truth, but agree with Vaclav Havel, who wrote, "Seek the company of those who seek the truth, and run away from those who have found it." Therefore, I think that fanatics, fundamentalists of every stripe, and all True Believers (in Eric Hoffer's sense of the term), are all people who have lost their way on a quest for the truth. Regarding the second part of my observation, many people in the middle of a life crisis believe they have lost their way, only to discover on the other side of the crisis that the experience was the best thing that ever happened to them. This is partly what John Dewey meant by "the teachable moment," and what JFK was talking about when he offered his famous saying that the Chinese symbol for "crisis" is composed of two characters: "danger" and "opportunity." Hope that clarifies what I meant.

Always remember that your life is your job,
and not vice versa.

One of the great lessons of history is that
people who were absolutely sure
they were right … were generally wrong.

If you want to see acts of enormous tolerance and generosity,
ask people to describe their own weaknesses and fatal flaws.

If all of human existence is like a grand painting,
then every individual life is a self-portrait.

The worst memory is the one that remembers everything.

To lead a more satisfying life,
accept the things you cannot change,
and change the things you cannot accept.

You can listen to people without loving them,
but you cannot love people without listening to them.

Robert Louis Stevenson once wrote,
"Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences."
What he didn't say, but might have, is that
we spend a lifetime preparing the menu,
but are often dissatisfied when the meal is finally served.

In most aspects of life, too much of something
is just as bad—and often much worse—than too little.

Most marriages would benefit enormously if both people
asked—and then honestly answered—the question,
"What must it be like to be in a relationship with me?"

Whenever you want other people to change, try to recall
how successfully you've been able to change in the past.

People reveal far more about themselves
when describing other people
than they do when describing themselves.

The brain and the heart are like the oars of a rowboat.
When you use only one to the exclusion of the other,
you end up going around in circles.

In physical fitness, the stretching comes before the exercise;
in mental fitness, the exercise comes first, the stretching after.

People who are most interested in telling the truth about others are
generally the least interested in having the truth told about themselves.

The struggle between reason and passion is a lifelong battle,
with periodic victories for each side,
and an uneasy truce holding most of the time.

In all human affairs, the wisest course is to
be passionate about the role of reason
and reasonable about the role of passion.

Dr. Mardy's 2006 Aphorisms

Never rely on your friends for money,
or on your money for friends.

The bad news is that we often find ourselves in trouble.
The good news is that in trouble, we often find ourselves.

The first casualty of war may be the truth,
but the first truth of war has always been the casualties.

In a relationship, it's hard to sustain the passion;
in a passionate affair, it's hard to sustain the relationship.

Words have incredible power.
They can make people's hearts soar,
and they can make people's hearts sore.

Many people believe that the best thing
about the legendary battle between the sexes
is the legendary sex between the battles.

Adolescence is a kind of slavery cleverly disguised as freedom.

Throughout history, one of the biggest problems is that
the correct course of action is not always obvious,
and the obvious course of action is not always correct.

It is a topsy-turvy world.
When we ask for advice, what we usually want is approval,
and when we ask for approval, what we usually get is advice.

Instead of talking in the hope that people will listen,
try listening to people in the hope that they will talk.

A man bears the same relationship to a woman
as a multiple-choice test does to an essay exam.

Creativity is a kind of healthy insanity.

Early success leads small people to failure;
early failure leads great people to success.

First people get fat;
then fat gets people.

The smartest people know exactly when to play dumb.

When describing themselves,
it is generally the things people fail to mention
which reflect their most important qualities.

If you are not honest with yourself,
you cannot tell the truth to other people.
(with a tip o' the hat to Virginia Woolf)

A lasting relationship is not necessarily a healthy one,
but a healthy relationship is likely to become a lasting one.

Never trust a person who's always critical,
and always distrust a person who never is.

One of life's most interesting reversals is
average people thinking they're extraordinary,
and extraordinary people thinking they're average.

If war is a continuation of politics by other means,
as Clausewitz wisely observed,
it may also be said that
politics is a continuation of war by peaceful means.

Bad-boy nonconformity has become so fashionable
that it's become the most slavish imitation of our time.

We all tend to see our character flaws as minor defects,
and the minor defects of others as character flaws.

The best CEOs try to make their companies
a safe place for those with wild ideas,
and a wild place for those with safe ideas.

The attempt to correct someone
can lead to a worsening of the error
if the remedy is too finely attempted.

People reveal far more about themselves by listening
than they could ever hope to reveal by talking.

Going without is one of the best ways of going within.

An experience of wealth generally works best for people
only after they have first accumulated a wealth of experience.

It's possible to feel homesick for a place you've never left.

Longwindedness is a very common shortcoming
and shortsightedness a longstanding problem.

Poetic prose is always preferable to prosaic poetry.

Some things emerge from so deep inside us
they appear to come from an outside source.

Before success, we must be able to accept rejection;
after success, we must be able to reject acceptance.
(with a tip o' the hat to Ray Bradbury)

The most tragic flaw of all is to believe
something is wrong with everyone else,
and that nothing is wrong with you.

There are two sure ways to fail:
dreaming too much and working too little,
and vice versa.

The worst memory may be the one that remembers too much.

Listening may be the most powerful statement a person can make.

The evolution of an inside trader:
they begin selling shares,
and end up sharing cells.

In criminal courts, the worst people look their best;
in civil courts, the opposite is true.

If you're wondering why there are so many problems in the world,
you won't find a much better explanation than this:
the people with power don't usually have enough wisdom,
and the ones with wisdom don't usually have enough power.

The young think about how they'll change the world,
the old think about how the world has changed.

To think that great love doesn't involve work
is just as mistaken as
thinking that great work doesn't involve love.

In most marriages, it is likely that
wives would be more respectful to husbands if they got more loving,
and husbands more loving to wives if they got more respect.

When all things are considered,
happiness is a better indicator of success
than success has ever been of happiness.

On the athletic fields as well as in life,
playing it safe is never a safe way to play.

One of history's great lessons is that
most of the Do-Gooders of the world have
never been particularly good doers.

Here's a piece of advice that has always served me well:
when you have trouble writing, try speaking;
when you have trouble speaking, try writing.

If you love a great value more
than you value a great love,
your priorities are in serious need of revision.

Advice to men:
when buying presents for the girl of your dreams,
make sure they're related to the dreams of your girl.

By trying to make things easier for people,
we often make things harder for them.

We often challenge the perceptions of others,
but only very rarely question our own.

Dr. Mardy's 2005 Aphorisms

It's easy to have fun while you're making money.
The challenge is to make money while you're having fun.

The first casualty of war may be the truth,
but the first truth of war has always been the casualties.

The best thing about the battle between the sexes
is often the sex between the battles.

The bad news: we often find ourselves in trouble.
The good news: in trouble, we often find ourselves.

When we're young, we test the limits.
When we're old, we limit the testing.

The secret of having it all is not having it all.

The most important things to listen to
are the things we don't want to hear.

Bluntness is a clumsy attempt to make a fine point.

Always try to do your best, no matter how bad you feel,
and always try to feel your best, no matter how bad you do.

Life has a way of keeping things in balance.
Just when someone great sees you as small,
There's always someone small who sees you as great.

If humility is the strength of the weak,
then hubris is the weakness of the strong.

We live better when we save a little,
and we save better when we live a little.

The wisest course of action is usually one in which
the head is influenced by the heart,
and the heart by the head.

By understanding myself, I better understand others
and by understanding others, I better understand myself.
(With a tip of the hat to Katherine Mansfield)

In infancy, we learn to wrinkle our faces,
in old age, we learn to face our wrinkles.

Never make the mistake of confusing
the things of importance
with the importance of things.

If you want to teach, you must learn,
and if you really want to learn, you must teach.

Being too strong is a sign of weakness.

In addition to putting your knowledge into action,
Don't forget to put a little action into your knowledge.

Taking a photograph requires opening a shutter.

We usually say, "What a difference a day makes."
But when somebody makes a much-needed change,
we can also say, "What a day a difference makes."

Being helpful is sometimes
the most unhelpful thing a person can do.

When a man listens to a woman,
she takes pleasures in his interest;
and if he continues to play his cards right,
she might even take interest in his pleasure.

Happy Valentine's Day!
Always remember:
If you want love in your life,
make sure you put some life into your love.

The only people not welcome
at youth hostels
are hostile youths.

It's easy to have fun while you're making money;
the challenge is to make money while you're having fun.

We don't see things the way they are,
we are because of the way we see things.

Almost all politicians dream of becoming great,
but few great people dream of becoming politicians.

Non-conforming youth may be the biggest conformists of them all.

The only thing more predictable than
the certainty of ignorance
is the ignorance of certainty.

Every man can be a father,
but a father is not always a man.

Marriage doesn't fail to meet the demands of people,
people fail to meet the demands of marriage.

Never treat life like a game
or a game like life.

Throughout the history of courtship,
unchaste women have been the most chased
and chaste women the most unchased.

Throughout history, most of the wrongs of the world have
resulted from people absolutely sure they were in the right.

Because bad times can be good for us
and good times can be bad for us,
it's an essential mark of maturity to be able
to tell the good bad times from the bad good times.

While it's foolish to overestimate the extent of your wisdom,
it's wise to overestimate your capacity for foolishness.

When writing becomes difficult, try speaking the words;
when speaking becomes difficult, try writing them down.

When we're young, everything is possible;
when we're old, possibilities are everything.

People can be divided into two groups,
those who want to be loved,
and those who love to be wanted.

When gazing into a mirror,
beauty looks for signs of ugliness,
and ugliness for signs of beauty.

While many hard-working parents grin and bear it,
their hard-partying college kids bare it and grin.

We all know that working out reduces stress,
but it's equally true that stressing out reduces work.

While victory is always preferred to defeat,
people learn far more from defeat than from victory.

We can never truly understand people when we hate them,
and we can never truly hate people when we understand them.

I have found it a good rule of thumb to
always question those who advocate,
and always advocate for those who question.

July 2005:
Last week, Lance Armstrong won another Tour de France.
It was a classic case of putting the pedal to the metal
and, even more important, the mettle to the pedal.

Instead of talking in the hope that people will listen,
try listening in the hope that people will talk.

The difference between cowards and heroes is that
heroes face what they fear and
cowards fear what they face.

Many things are the exact reverse of earlier times.
Young men used to be questioned by the pop
before they popped the question.
But they also used to get married first
and have children later,
in contrast to the current arrangement.

Instead of saying that people have addictions,
Isn't it more accurate to say that addictions have people?

The reason great political oratory is dead is because
too many politicians think dead political oratory is great.

People who talk too much say even less
than people who talk too little.

Cemetery: a place where dead people live.

Sailor: a person who is grounded by the sea.

Desert: an ocean of sand.

Mother Teresa once said,
"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."
She might have added,
"If you love people, you have no time to judge them."

An effective leader commands respect;
an ineffective one only respects a command.

When our friends change
it is not necessary to change our friends.

While many good people are bad managers,
bad people never make good managers.

The best learning occurs during the worst of times,
the worst learning during the best of times.

While many are attracted by the idea of adventure,
there's even more thrill in the adventure of ideas.

Dr. Mardy's 2000 Aphorisms (January - May)

January 2000

When I hear it said that people are stuck in the past, I think,
"Isn't it more accurate to say the past is stuck in them?"

Socrates said, "The unexamined life is not worth living."
Isn't it equally true that "The unlived life is not worth examining."

What most people want more
than a wealth of experience
is an experience of wealth.

The value of education
lies less in answering questions
than it does in questioning answers.

Human beings can be divided into two types:
cosmopolitan people who believe nothing human is foreign,
and xenophobes who believe nothing foreign is human.

Even though living well is the best revenge,
revenge is never the best way to live well.

Better late than never is a good general rule.
But some things are clearly better never than late.

Too often, people fail to make a distinction
between things of importance
and the importance of things.

The politics of hatred can ultimately lead
to only one result, the hatred of politics.

Where nothing is sacred, sacred is nothing.

When you're preoccupied with love, you have no time for business;
when you're preoccupied with business, you have no time for love.

For every person who's gone but not forgotten,
it seems like there's another who's forgotten but not gone.

The secret of life consists of
accepting the things you can't change and
changing the things you can't accept.

A guy who aspires to become a man of the world
should also strive to become a world of a man.

We will only be able to take the heart out of hatred
when we can take the hatred from out of our hearts.

When the right can do no wrong,
The wrong can do no right.

Wheaties has long been known as The Breakfast of Champions.
Why haven't they also hailed it as The Champion of Breakfasts?

George Santayana once said,
"The great difficulty in education is to get experience out of idea."
We could reverse that and say,
"The great difficulty in living is to get ideas out of experience."

All private people have something they wish would become public,
and all public people have something they wish would remain private.

The challenge in selecting people (whether in business or in love)
is differentiating those who are more qualified than they seem
from those who seem more qualified than they are.

Instead of putting their money where their mouth is,
some people just put their mouth where the money is.

We've long believed that insight leads to great change.
It's also true that change often leads to great insight.

In addition to going absent without leave (AWOL) ,
it's also possible for some soldiers to leave without being absent.

Some people are so self-reliant,
they're not interested in what others think;
and some people are so interested in what others think,
they'll never be self-reliant.

In a reversal of the age-old phenomenon of
bad people pretending to be good,
we now see among many middle-class adolescents
a curious and sometimes comical phenomenon,
good people pretending to be bad.

If you want to continue to have love in your life,
don't forget to put some life in your love.

People used to get married and a few years later start a family.
Nowadays, they're doing it the other way around.

Misanthropes and curmudgeons
differ in one very important way:
misanthropes love to hate,
curmudgeons hate to love.

One way of looking at adolescents is to see them as
creatures who love the things adults hate,
and hate the things adults love.

People can be roughly divided into two groups:
one is guided by what's reasonable, even if it's not pleasurable,
the other by what's pleasurable, even it it's not reasonable."

In the mating game, people frequently complain
about having to choose between someone who has
looks without the personality
or personality without the looks.

February 2000

Neatniks have a place for everything;
slobs a thing for every place.

It is helpful to remember that
all truth contains an element of error,
and all error an element of truth.

The two most powerful forces
in the history of the world have been
the love of power and the power of love.

The wisest course of action is generally one in which
the head is influenced by the heart,
and the heart by the head.

We've long known that politics makes strange bedfellows.
It's now also clear that bedfellows make for very strange politics.

One of the biggest problems facing moderate politicians
is liberals thinking they're too conservative
and conservatives thinking they're too liberal.

Why is it that the people who have the power generally lack the wisdom,
and the people who have the wisdom generally lack the power?

What is natural is not always good,
and what is good is not always natural.

Experience may be one of the best teachers,
and a great teacher is one of the best experiences.

When birds of a feather flock together,
we call it a gang or a clique.
But when feathers of a bird flock together,
we call it good insulation.

Money may not be the root of all evil,
but evil is definitely at the root of lots of money.

From a man's point of view,
some women are simply irresistible,
and others are irresistibly simple.

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day.
Remember that love of words
can be very useful
when composing words of love.

Today is Valentine's Day.
For love in your life
put life in your love.

The goal of all great stage entertainers
is to make the audience a part of the show
and the show a part of the audience.

Too many suitors believe that
the objects of their affection have
too much affection for objects.

It's often hard to get to
the heart of the matter
in matters of the heart.

While it's always stupid to feign wisdom,
it's sometimes wise to pretend stupidity.

While it's often said that one's previous friendships
can destroy a marriage,
it's also true that a marriage
can destroy one's previous friendships.

It is helpful to remember that
the most serious person has a playful side,
and the most playful person a serious side.

I heard a good one recently from someone who'd read
"The Complete Idiot's Guide to Dating."
She said someone should write another book called
"The Guide to Dating Complete Idiots."

All great artists have learned the secret of
infusing their art into their lives,
and their lives into their art.

There are highly intelligent people who are not very wise;
and extremely wise people who are not very intelligent.

Many people with finery are not at all refined,
and many refined people have no need of finery.

People who don't find happiness generally seek it;
but people who seek happiness generally don't find it.

Poorly-timed advances lead to retreats;
well-timed retreats lead to advances.

During bad times we remember good times,
during good times we forget bad times.

The search for meaning is only successful
when we find meaning in the search.

Waterfowl everywhere hate
foul water anywhere.

March 2000

When I observe many young people these days
I sometimes wonder which they prefer most:
the pursuit of happiness,
or the happiness of pursuit.

It is a maxim among marriage and family counselors that
problems in the living room cause problems in the bedroom,
and vice versa.

The French writer La Rochefoucauld wrote,
"One forgives to the degree that one loves."
Isn't the reverse even more true?
"One loves to the degree that one forgives."

People who focus all their attention on success don't have any fun,
and vice versa.

Seven Suggested Advertising Slogans:
1.
For National Public Radio:
"Get Into Your Radio.
And Let Your Radio Get Into You."

2.
For the History Channel:
"Bringing History to Life.
Bringing Life to History."

3.
Holiday Ad for a Liquor Company:
"The Spirit of Giving
Includes
the Giving of Spirits."

4.
For Bud Lite:
"We Made a Great Beer Light.
And a Light Beer Great."

5.
For the Adult Literacy Project:
"Learn to Read.
Read to Learn."

6.
For Wheaties:
"The Breakfast of Champions.
The Champion of Breakfasts."

7.
For a Great Dance Club:
"The Unbeatable Spot
For an Unstoppable Beat."

No matter what the field of endeavor,
in order to get the best results,
theory must be grounded in practice,
and practice must be guided by theory.

If gratitude is the memory of the heart,
as someone once said,
then memory is the gratitude of the mind.

The successful struggle against depression
might well be called,
a long night's journey into day.

While all prejudices are firmly held convictions,
all firmly held convictions are not prejudices.

In every organization there are
some people who are gone but not forgotten
and others who are forgotten but not gone.

While we tend to focus our attention on wolves in sheep's clothing
it's also possible to occasionally find a sheep in wolf's clothing.

There's no getting around it—listening to others
is still the best way to get others to listen to you.

Instead of saying that people have addictions,
it's probably more accurate to say that addictions have people.

As Spring starts busting out,
men take great pleasure in all the
busts that start springing out.

Women talk in order to clarify their thoughts,
men clarify their thoughts in order to talk.

The only thing more predictable
than the illusion of certainty is the certainty of illusion.

As they approach marriage, men and women make the opposite mistake.
Women hope men will change, but they always seem to remain the same.
Men hope women will remain the same, but they always seem to change.

Some people dance because they're happy;
others are happy because they dance.

Never trust a person who's always critical, and
always distrust a person who never is.

Making an error while in the pursuit of truth is more noble
than stumbling upon truth while in the clutches of error.

When you don't become what you'd like,
try to like what you've become.

Always try to do your best, no matter how bad you feel,
and always try to feel your best, no matter how bad you do.

Men prefer women
who are active sexually
but not sexually active.

When people expect nothing, something can seem like everything;
when people expect everything, something can seem like nothing.

In the age-old battle of the sexes,
the desire of women for commitment
is often pitted against
the commitment of men for desire.

April 2000

Never become the tool of your enemies,
or the enemy of your tools.

Impatient people
burn while other people fiddle.

The only thing men like more than
undressing women with their eyes
is eyeing them when they undress.

The old saying "This too shall pass" applies to everything.
No matter how bad things are, the good news is it won't last forever.
No matter how good things are, the bad news is it won't last forever.

I saw a great bumper sticker the other day:
"I support the right to arm bears."

Farmers, gardeners, divers, and contrarian investors
believe that what goes down must come up.

In medical testing, why is it that
negative results are positive
and positive results negative?

No matter how often people struggle with the idea,
we're always a part of our families,
and our families are always a part of us.

More than 2,000 years before Paul Simon
Archimedes might have written a song called,
"Fifty Ways to Love Your Lever."

Obesity is rampant because when the chips are down,
too many people decide to down the chips.

Fools are of far more value to philosophy
than philosophy is to fools.

The secret of a successful relationship consists of
avoiding the unforgivable and forgiving the unavoidable.

Many leaders with many great qualities
still don't have that elusive quality of greatness.

When all things are considered,
happiness is a far better indicator of success
than success is of happiness.

Two sure-fire ways of becoming a business success are
to find a market for a great product,
or to develop a product for a great market.

Compared to the number of people who have a lust for life,
many more people have what might be called a life for lust.

Isn't it interesting that many people
who love to learn never learn to love?

While it's easy to make a case that "It's great to be average,"
It's difficult to argue that "It's average to be great."

A poem is a painting for the ears,
A painting is a poem for the eyes.

One of life's most interesting reversals is
average people thinking they're extraordinary,
and extraordinary people thinking they're average.

Life has a way of keeping things in balance.
When someone great sees you as small,
there's always someone small who sees you as great.

Love doesn't fade when beauty goes,
as someone once said;
beauty fades when love goes.

It's true that all the world is a stage,
as Shakespeare wisely observed.
But isn't it also true that
the stage is every actor's world.

As we get older,
we often change the things we desire,
but we rarely change our desire for things

Dreams are the wishes of the heart.
Wishes are the dreams of the head.

Just as it's possible to speak of an idea whose time has come,
it's also possible to speak of a time whose ideas are over.

I take a nap nearly every day,
but sometimes it's more accurate to say
that the nap takes me.
(a tip of the hat to Samuel Johnson)

For centuries, religious fanatics have
found errors in the amusements of mankind.
Satirists have seen the same things in reverse,
finding amusement in all those errors.

Some people with the right stuff
keep forgetting that they still
have to do the stuff right.

In a strange perversion, there are some twisted people
who love the detestable and detest the lovable.

May 2000

Maturity can only come when we begin to
question some things we have long accepted, and
accept some other things we have long questioned.

Today, as I celebrate my 58th birthday,
I find special meaning in the old saying,
"It's not the years in your life,
it's the life in your years."

Always question those who advocate,
and always advocate for those who question.

The only thing worse than
believing everything and doubting nothing
is doubting everything and believing nothing.

Sometimes we milk the experience,
sometimes the experience milks us.

For single men on the make,
there are two kinds of women:
the kind to put a hold on,
and the kind to put on hold.

Prisons don't just incarcerate criminals;
they also criminalize the incarcerated.

A great presentation can be ruined by a bad joke,
and a great joke can be ruined by a bad presentation.

Some people have outside interests
that interfere with their jobs.
Some other people have the opposite problem.

Throughout the history of courtship,
unchaste women have been the most chased
and chaste women the most unchased.

People only believe in leaders
when leaders believe in people.

Instead of saying, "What in the name of God am I going to do,"
devout people say, "What am I going to do in the name of God."

Beauty looks in a mirror for signs of ugliness,
ugliness looks for signs of beauty.

It is foolish to overestimate the extent of your wisdom,
and wise to overestimate the extent of your foolishness.

When we're young, everything is possible;
when we're old, possibilities are everything.

Dr. Mardy's 2000 Aphorisms (June - December)

June 2000

We learn better by doing,
and we do better by learning.

In life, the wisest course of action is generally not the most popular,
and the most popular course of action is often not the wisest.

The popular Zen Buddhist saying can be reversed
in the case of the Miracle-Working Anne Sullivan:
"When this teacher was ready, the student did appear."

Have you ever noticed that
the thinnest people tend to be the most fat-headed
and the fattest people the most thin-skinned?

When expressing their opinions,
people make two major blunders:
never stopping to think and
never thinking to stop.

Advice for CEOs:
Think like a leader and
lead like a thinker.

It's always a mistake to think you're
too important to do unimportant things
and vice versa.

Advice to CEOs:
If you want people to buy into your vision,
make sure your vision is worth buying into.

Willy and Waylon won a Grammy for their musical warning,
"Mammas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys."
Maybe they should've also warned them about the converse:
"Don't Let Your Cowboys Grow Up to Be Babies."

When a husband stops kissing the Mrs.
It's the wife who starts missing the kisses.

While some people need to put toughness in their love.
there are even more who need to put some love in their toughness.

There's more joy in the pursuit of meaning
than there is meaning in the pursuit of joy.

In the following four observations, the words of popular sayings are reversed. I have coined the term "implied chiasmus" to describe such quotations. For more on this fascinating type of chiasmus, see Implied Chiasmus.

How to fix a stuck zipper:
Put a little ointment on the fly.

All elementary school children have
experienced the labor of division.

Most red-blooded American men are firmly
committed to the happiness of pursuit.

Lance Armstrong's recent Tour de France performances
are a perfect example of a man
putting his mettle to the pedal.

July 2000

The world may be fortunate that
the most fanatical do-gooders
have not been especially good-doers.

Exceptionally good children can spoil their parents,
just as much as
exceptionally bad parents can spoil their children.

Have you ever noticed that
the people who have all the answers
don't understand the questions,
and the people who ask all the questions
don't appreciate the answers?

These following three quotations are examples of "shorthand chiasmus." In such observations, expressions like "vice versa" and "the reverse is true" are used to indicate a chiastic reversal. Chiastic shorthand is not only characterized by an economy of words, but it has the added benefit of drawing people into the expression as they are forced to complete the thought themselves. For more on this type of chiasmus, see Chiastic Shorthand.

The two biggest problems in marital intimacy are
too much desire and not enough sex,
and vice versa.

Many people are attracted to the romance in danger;
with many others, the reverse is true.

The wise person knows other people without judging them;
the fool does exactly the opposite.

When people do bad things,
are their heads in the wrong?
Or is the wrong in their heads?

In a tragic irony, many relationships begin
with a woman asking a man to protect her from others,
and end with her asking others to protect her from the man.

Always try to understand, especially when you don't agree;
but never agree until you're sure you understand.

According to a time-honored tradition,
the heroic warrior never
displays a fear or fears a display.

Golf is a game which is
all about playing the difficult lies
and lying about the difficult plays.

August 2000

The odd man used to be out
and the "out" man used to be odd.
But now the "out" man is in
and the "in" man is odd.

Some character actors are
so villainous-looking that
they make very good bad guys
and very bad good guys.

It's hard to keep a good man down, it's true;
but it's also hard to keep a down man good.

The 2000 Republican Convention was
a mirror image of the 1992 Democratic Convention.
Then we saw a Democrat promoting traditionally Republican values.
This year we saw exactly the reverse.

Working out reduces stress and
stressing out reduces work.

There are degrees of pedantry,
and, all too often, pedantry in degrees.

When we're young, we test the limits.
When we're old, we limit the testing.

The reason great political oratory is dead is because
too many politicians think dead political oratory is great.

While it's okay to feel a fear,
you should never fear a feeling.

Religious traditionalists warn against making a God of man.
Religious progressives warn against making a man of God.
And feminist theologians agree with both.

"Wealthy and powerful people tend to be
great at judging the pathology of the poor,
but poor at judging their own great pathology.

Why do we so readily criticize business people for being bad at philosophy
and so easily forgive philosophers for being bad at business?

When employees don't raise the bar,
employers tend to bar the raises.

September 2000

Don't be content with
simply trying to do your best,
be the best at what you're trying to do.

We begin life learning how to wrinkle our faces
and end by learning how to face our wrinkles.

We usually say, "What a difference a day makes."
But when somebody makes a much-needed change,
we can also say, "What a day a difference makes."

Defeat does not necessarily mean failure,
and failure does not necessarily mean defeat.

The French aphorist La Rochefoucauld wrote,
"The mind cannot long act the role of the heart."
He might also have written, "And vice versa."

When the Knights of the Round Table got old and overweight,
I wonder if people began calling them the Table of the Round Knights.

The only people not welcome
at youth hostels are hostile youths.

People who can't quit smoking
may want to ask themselves,
"Have I really tried to stop,
or have I stopped really trying?"

The world would be a better place if…

… wise people had more power
and powerful people more wisdom.

… creative types were more businesslike
and business types more creative.

… hard-nosed people were more soft-hearted
and soft-hearted people more hard-nosed.

… serious people were more fun-loving
and fun-loving people more serious.

We don't see things the way they are,
we are because of the way we see things.

Below are three chiastic riddles I've created for your puzzling pleasure. After each riddle, I'll provide a hint that should be helpful in suggesting the answer. Try to work them out before looking at the answers, which appear just after the riddles:

1. What's the difference between a forgetful person and an ugly one?
(Hint: Think about "faces" and "memories").

2. What's the difference between driveways and parkways?
(Hint: Think about what you do on each).

3. How have Baby Boomers changed from the 1970s to the present day?
(Hint: Think "weed").

And the answers are:

1. The forgetful person has a bad memory for faces;
the ugly person a bad face for memories.

2. People drive on parkways
and park on driveways.

3. They used to be interested in killer weed;
now they're interested in weed killer.

October 2000

What did the homicidal boarding house owner plead in court?
"The deaths of my roomers are greatly exaggerated."

Motto of the highly competitive athlete:
"Whatever doesn't make me better, kills me."

Motto of the Black-and-White thinker:
To question or not to question, that is the way to be.

These all example of "implied chiasmus," in which the words of popular sayings are reversed. For more on the device, see Implied Chiasmus.

Cops not only tail suspects,
they also suspect their tales.

The art of lying consists of
telling a story that is true,
but not the true story.

People begin by thinking that they are helping the handicapped
and end by realizing that it is the handicapped that have helped them.

Here are three more chiastic riddles for your puzzling pleasure. In each case, I'll provide a hint to help you divine the answer.

1. What did the school of tuna say to the fishermen?
(Hint: think "catching" and "canning")

2. What's the difference between a fickle woman and a penny-pinching woman?
(Hint: thing about two different meanings of "change")

3. What's the difference between an amorous policeman and his affectionate wife?
(Hint: think "cop" and what amorous people do).

Try to resist the temptation to look ahead. Chiastic riddles are much more satisfying when you solve them on your own. The answers are:

1. Catch us if you can and can us if you catch us.

2. One changes her mind and the other minds her change.

3. He cops a feel and she feels a cop.

Some people have a passionate regard for life,
others only a lifetime regard for passion.

While a fact can sometimes speak volumes,
too often a volume only speaks facts.

Stuffing your face
is not a good way
of facing your stuff.

The need to demonstrate strength reveals weakness,
the willingness to reveal weakness demonstrates strength.

November 2000

When image is everything,
everything is image.

In problem solving,
people rarely exhaust the alternatives;
usually the alternatives exhaust the people.

For centuries, people have said that
life can only be lived fully when it has meaning.
But isn't it also true that
life can only have meaning when it is lived fully?

Referring to ancient Greece, the German writer Schiller wrote:
"When the gods were more manlike,
Men were more godlike."
Comparing the Greek gods to the Judeo-Christian God,
I wonder if he was also suggesting:
"When God became less manlike,
did man became less godlike?"

"Hope leads to the loss of fear,
and fear to the loss of hope."
(a tip of the hat to John Milton)

Winners have trouble accepting failure;
losers have trouble failing to accept.

One can look good without being good-looking,
and good-looking without looking good.

The world can be roughly divided into two types:
those who look better than they are,
and those who are better than they look.

If your work is not in your heart
your heart will never be in your work.

It's hard to keep a good thing going
and a going thing good.

The correct course of action is not always obvious,
and the obvious course of action is not always correct.

We used to focus on ways of bringing people to work.
In the electronic age, the situation is reversed,
and we now focus on ways of bringing work to people.

December 2000

The love of music is sweet,
but never so sweet as the music of love.

Never treat life like a game
or a game like it was life.

W. H. Auden once said, "To ask the hard question is simple."
He might have added, "And to ask the simple question is hard."

People may not always get what they deserve,
but they usually deserve what they get.

The widespread use of tobacco threatens the health industry,
and a widespread focus on health threatens the tobacco industry.

For free-spending materialists, money is no object.
For self-denying ascetics, the object is no money.

When people change their minds,
isn't it more accurate to say
that their minds have changed them?

People have always hoped that life will bring love,
but what they really love is when life brings hope.

The following four quotations are examples of "shorthand chiasmus," a term I coined to refer to chiastic reversals that are indicated by such verbal conventions as "vice versa" or "the reverse is true." For more on this type of chiasmus, see Chiastic Shorthand.

For centuries, people have used power and influence to obtain sex,
and vice versa.

In criminal courts, the worst people look their best;
in civil courts, the opposite is true.

For more than 200 years,
Presidents have named members of the Supreme Court.
This past week, that process was reversed.

The most serious point can be made with a joke.
The reverse is not true.

The wisest people learn
to be accepting of criticism,
and critical of acceptance.

When parents tune in to their kids,
kids get in tune with their parents.

What is learned unwillingly
will be willingly unlearned.

Many have sought happiness without finding it,
but not many have found happiness without seeking it.